


Shadow

by Subarukun



Category: Ginga Eiyuu Densetsu | Legend of the Galactic Heroes
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Introspection, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2014-12-19
Packaged: 2018-03-02 06:59:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2803691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Subarukun/pseuds/Subarukun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Siegfried Kircheis knows he's devoted to Reinhard von Müsel and will follow him without question.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Shadow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LadyOscar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyOscar/gifts).



Siegfried never knows what it is he sees the first time he looks at Reinhard. He just knows it's not just the kid next door. There is just something about him that makes him shine. Sometimes it's anger and rage, sometimes it's just pure and simple happiness and sometimes in his quiet moments it's just _there_ and Siegfried can't really name it. It's just something. Maybe strength. Maybe pride. Maybe just Reinhard's belief in himself.

He envies it a little, but he finds it too compelling to every actually be jealous.

Annerose has it, too. Something like it, more quiet, more feminine, but something that sets her apart from any woman he's ever met.

It's not something learned, just something present in the way they carry themselves.

Even now sitting with both of them at the table, Annerose giving him another glass of milk, he can't quite believe that these two are now his friends.

* * *

The happiness is short lived.

Siegfried watches the way Reinhard's eyes sparkle with anger every-time someone mentions his father, his sister – the Kaiser. 

“It's unfair. I won't stand for it,” he mutters. “I'm going to fight for her.”

“I know.” They are just kids, but Siegfried already knows that his life has changed and that for him there will be no turning back now. He has a family who loves him, but for Reinhard there is only Annerose who might as well be a prisoner only allowed to see her brother at intervals – and him, his only real friend. 

“I can't do it without you,” Reinhard says between his teeth. 

He smiles, because he knows that's how Reinhard is feeling _now_ , but he has already learned something important about his friend and he knows that Reinhard could do whatever he set his mind to. “I'm not going anywhere.”

“Yes,” Reinhard says. “Yes, you are. Please. Come with me.”

They are just children, just boys who have their whole lives ahead of them, but it to Siegfried it feels like the gods have already decided his destiny.

“Of course,” he says, not sure Reinhard knows what he's agreeing to.

* * *

Siegfried can't say he'd ever dreamed of being a soldier. Soldiers are always needed with the continuous war raging, but as he wasn't from any well know, rich family or of high birth, he'd never seen a career in front of him with the military. 

“You're a good fighter,” Reinhard tells him. “All the aristocratic sons look down on you now, Kircheis, but they'll not know what hit them. You're better than all of them.”

It's high praise coming from Reinhard who excels at practically everything and who many of the older boy underestimate for his looks and slight frame, but who can take out three or even four boys older and bigger than him by using their own weaknesses against them. 

Military training is changing them both, Siegfried realizes, but Reinhard, who is only looking forward toward his goal to put everyone in their place and protect his sister – even if it means to take their world apart - is rapidly learning and adapting. “I'm nowhere near as good as you,” Siegfried tells him.

Reinhard grins at him, his blue eyes sparkling. He's not vain, but proud. And he knows his own abilities, tests them every single day. “Maybe,” he concedes, “but you're still the best of them.” 

He huffs and smiles. 

It's good to see Reinhard smiling and he'll enjoy every minute of it. 

They've decided to do whatever is necessary to free Annerose from the Kaiser's grasp, but Siegfried hopes that through all that is ahead Reinhard won't lose his ability to smile like this. 

No victory would be worth that.

* * *

They are young and people take notice as they rise through the ranks. Everyone, of course, is looking at Reinhard von Müsel. Many whisper about his sister's influence behind their backs, but the truth is that Reinhard's genius is rising and nobody more than Siegfried Kricheis knows that there is no stopping a rising star like Reinhard's.

People begin to call him Reinhard's shadow, but Siegfried doesn't mind. It's oddly fitting. He's close to Reinhard, closer than most of these people will ever be, and he watches his back wherever he goes. They've chosen a dangerous path, together, only boys back then, but by now they both know exactly what they are doing. They are learning and bidding their time, but they are aiming for treason when the time is right. 

So, yes, he's happy to be Reinhard's shadow, the one who follows and hears his secret thoughts.The only one who is as close to him as his sister.

He looks at his friend with pride every time he succeeds, every time he climbs another step on the ladder to the top, on the way towards his big goal.

He just hopes he can follow.

* * *

“How is he?”

“How is what?” Siegfried asks back, not even looking at the burly lieutenant who he's been paired with for the training op. 

“In bed I mean?”

Siegfried stares at him for a long moment and then turns around to lash out, hitting the man in the jaw before he even knows what's happening. Startled he goes down and sits there, dumbfounded and staring up and him. Siegfried says: “I've beat up better fighters who thought they could badmouth my friend.” He doesn't turn away, keeps staring angrily and adds: “He's like a brother to me.”

But by now he's old enough to know that this is a lie.

Reinhard will always be something more.

He's in love and he has a duty that won't allow him to ever stop loving the person he has chosen to protect.

* * *

Reinhard von Müsel becomes Reinhard von Lohengramm.

Siegfried Kircheis remains his friend and shadow. And he's still in love.

But with their changing positions, with the new influences and allies things also change a little.

They used to argue and make up immediately. Their disagreements are different now. But Kircheis knows Reinhard is still the most important person in his life.

“You know people matter,” Siegfried says. “Your own technical and military genius runs away with you sometimes, but people matter. Life matters. Civilians who die in these battles aren't just numbers and statistics. They are someone's family.”

Reinhard looks at him hard and then looks away. “Don't berate me,” he says in a low voice. He gets up and his cape is swinging behind him. He's cutting an impressive figure: head held high, eyes blazing, striding across the floor towards him.

“I'm not berating you,” he answers, because they both know he's not here to do this. But he has opinions, just like Reinhard, and he may be his shadow, but he's not afraid to think for himself.

“You'd get along well with Yang Wen-li, if half of what our intelligence services know about him is even true.” 

“So would you,” Siegfried tells him and grins. “Don't pretend.”

Reinhard actually smiles as he comes to stand beside him to stare into the endless blackness of space beyond the thick glass. “It would be exciting to meet someone like that,” he agrees. Then his face changes into a more serious expression again and he turns to look up at Siegfried. “Kircheis,” he says, nearly whispering. “Lets not argue any more.”

He nods. “We're not really arguing.”

But Reinhard's new position is putting him under a lot of pressure and sometimes he gets carried away. Siegfried knows that at the heart of it he is still the same warm-hearted person, who hates injustice, he was all those years ago, but politics don't allow the boy from then to show his head very often.

“I can't do this without you,” Reinhard says. “I never could.”

Siegfried hopes it is still true.

* * *

Finally it's Reinhard who kisses him first.

He's too surprised properly react right away as it happens, his mind only catching up with him, when Reinhard's tongue strokes along the top of his mouth and then his arms come around his shoulders and he kisses back like he only in secret moments allowed himself to think about. 

“Kircheis,” Reinhard whispers. 

He knows he can't talk now. He has wanted this for too long.

“I want you to be your own man,” Reinhard says, and it sounds like good-bye and his stomach is clenching painfully at the thought. “I want you to have a career, so that everybody sees the man I know you are. But every time I send you away...” He breaks of. “I know I really want you here. With me.”

He doesn't answer. The kiss, the words, it all has made him bold now. He wants.

And Reinhard wants to.

* * *

They remain in bed. Reinhard won't be able to hide away from the world forever, but for the moment this is only the two of them, two young men who've pined for each other, who know each other, but are discovering each other anew now.

Reinhard is stroking his hair and he's only loosely holding him against his chests, their eyes meeting in the dark of the room. 

“It's still true. I can't do this without you.”

“You'll never have to,” he whispers back and his heart flutters when Reinhard smiles softly, a very private smile he hasn't seen in years.

“Good.”

He knows he's where he truly belongs. His duty is still with Reinhard first and foremost, but maybe now his genius can turn to building personal happiness too.

“I don't want you to be my concubine,” he says and it only sounds half joking.

“I'm not here because you bought me from my family. I'm here because I want to be. I've followed you here, right to this moment.”

Reinhard stares. The next moment he is on him, pressing him down and kissing.

He would still be happy to be just be his shadow, his friend, his brother. But for the first time he realizes that they've been lovers all along.


End file.
